Chrissy Teigenis learning to heal after suffering the loss of her son.

On Wednesday morning, the 35-year-old model and cookbook author shared aphotograph of herself on Instagram, where she candidly spoke about her body, mourning that she will never be pregnant again following the loss of her son — whom she and husbandJohn Legendnamed Jack — after 20 weeks of pregnancy in September.

“This is me and my body, just yesterday. Even though I’m no longer pregnant, every glance in the mirror reminds me of what could have been,” Teigen writes. “And I have no idea why i still have this bump, honestly. It’s frustrating.”

Then, noting that she is “proud of where this entire journey took my body and mind in other ways,” Teigen adds, “I love being pregnant, so so much, and I’m sad I never will be again.”

“But I am lucky to have two amazing little ones who are transforming into big little people more and more every single day,” she says.

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On Tuesday, Teigen shared a video of herself on herInstagram Storyafter a therapy session.

Noticeably emotional in the clip, Teigen joked around with her social media followers and made light of her situation. “This is like a post-therapy face filter,” she says in the video, before she sniffles and adds, “Those are boogers.”

Chrissy Teigen/Instagram

Chrissy Teigen

Last month, Teigen and Legendtold PEOPLEthey have been able to find a “little bit of sunshine” recently as they continue to grieve the loss of their son.

“You learn how to cope with it. I am very proud to say that there’s multiple different therapies I’m using to hopefully become the same person that I was, and I’m okay with that,” Teigen said. “I’m okay with allowing myself to have bad days and good days.”

In a candid message last month, Teigen told fans on Twitter that she hasn’t been active on social media “because I’mhonestly in a bit of a grief depression holebut do not worry as I have so much help around me to get better and I’ll be fixed soon.”

RELATED VIDEO:Chrissy Teigenand John Legend Open Up About Their ‘Grief’ as They Announce New Charity Initiative

Then, aftercelebrating a downsized Thanksgivingwith her family — including sonMiles Theodore, 2½, and daughterLuna Simone, 4½ — Teigenwroteon Instagram that, while it’s been “brutal” lately, she feels like she’s improving mentally.

“when I’m old and grey, I will look back on the last two months as being brutal, exhausting, sad, physically challenging, mentally painful bitches of a couple months. But I refuse to not find humor in both the rage-fits and the outfits,” she said at the time.

source: people.com